Ah, the benefits of having an older sibling

"Hamlet was a ham, and Piglet was his father. Now his uncle was evil, so he went and killed Piglet. Then Hamlet's mother, Sowlet, married Hamlet's uncle." --My sister, ~10 years ago when I asked her what Hamlet was about

This was her followup explanation, now that I'm going to be reading Hamlet next for AP Lit:
"Piglet had to die, as a preemptive strike against swine flu."